Text Box: a choice to become a VICTIM. I spent many years of my life absolutely believing that I was how I was because of what had happened to me. A portrait for giving power away to others. “Things” just happened to me and oh, poor me, how and why was this ALWAYS happening. Couldn’t anyone see that I was being so taken advantage of and that others (particularly men) were the cause. GET REAL here Wendi was the answer. Grow up and get over it!!!!!! “Things” happened to me because I called them too me with my mind-set which was all about “let’s all feel sorry for Wendi—poor baby sure has had a rough life”. I constantly gave all my power away because I ALLOWED things from the past to rule my every day life. Nobody can EVER take advantage of you unless you allow them to do so. Others do what they do and it is YOUR reaction to what they do that is the problem. Now, this doesn’t mean that what they did was ok—as in my Text Box: In this issue I’m called to respond to an issue that is almost constantly appearing in my discussions with client’s and students and, by the way, one with which I am intimately familiar since I fully and totally embraced the consciousness of being a victim for many, many years. This issue is of such great concern to me that I am devoting more than one page—speaking to/at it. The bottom line with this issue is that you are either in Victim Consciousness- or - you are not. There is absolutely no in-between on this issue. Embracing the Victim archetype means that everything happens “to you” and that nothing is ever your fault as everything is always based upon something that happened to you to “cause” you to function as you do. Rather than go on and on about this issue I’m going to use myself as an example. In my case, I was severely victimized from early childhood through my early adult years. I experienced sexual abuse as early as 3 years of age (the first of my memories and I absolutely know that it wasn’t the first time because I was entirely too comfortable with what Text Box: was happening) through my young adult years by members of my family. Additionally, I was severely physically abused—being beaten on a regular basis and much of my middle and high school years were spent covering the evidence—when I could do so - and feeling extreme shame. A note here—There is absolutely NO need to feel “sorry” for me (I did way too much of that myself) because if these things hadn’t happened I wouldn’t have had the need to learn and explore and therefore wouldn’t have searched for the opportunities which have enabled me to be the person I am today! More about this in a bit. Now, what this really means is that I WAS victimized but being victimized does not mean that you will have a victim consciousness UNLESS you CHOOSE to embrace that particular leg trap. Yes, I do mean choose!!!!! In my case, I can pinpoint the exact moment in time when I made that choice—the details do not matter in this context; however I absolutely did make

VICTIM CONSCIOUSNESS or SELF-EMPOWERMENT?
Text Box: Spirits of Nativelight

May 15, 2006

Volume 1, issue 3